In short
- An obituary announces the death, tells the story of a life in a few paragraphs, names the family and gives the details of the service.
- Most are 200 to 450 words. Newspapers charge by length, while the funeral home website and a memorial page usually do not.
- Start with the facts, then add one or two things only your family would know. That is what people remember.
In this article
What an obituary looks like
Before the rules, here is a complete obituary of an ordinary length. Notice the order: the announcement, her life, who she was, her family, the service.
Margaret Ann "Peggy" Wilson, 78, of Dayton, Ohio, died peacefully at home on October 12, 2026, with her family by her side.
Peggy was born in 1948 in Cincinnati, the oldest of five children. She taught second grade for 31 years, and former students still stopped her at the grocery store to say hello. She married Robert Wilson in 1971, and they spent 52 happy years together, most of them arguing about the best way to drive to the lake.
She loved her garden, crossword puzzles done in pen, and any excuse to bake for a crowd. Her pound cake was required at every family gathering.
Peggy is survived by her children, Susan (Mark) Davis and Michael (Jen) Wilson, six grandchildren, and her sisters, Carol and Joan. She was preceded in death by her husband, Bob.
Visitation will be held Thursday, October 16, from 4 to 7 p.m. at Riverside Funeral Home. The funeral will be Friday at 10 a.m. in the funeral home chapel. In lieu of flowers, the family asks for donations to the public library, where Peggy volunteered for 15 years.
What to include
Almost every obituary follows the same order. You do not need every part, but it helps to go through the list:
- The announcement: full name, with a nickname or maiden name if people knew them by it, age, city, and the date of death.
- Their life: where and when they were born, their parents, school, work, military service, marriage.
- Who they were: what they loved, what they were known for, a habit, a saying, a passion.
- The family: who survives them, such as a spouse, children, grandchildren and siblings, and who died before them.
- The service: the date, time and place of the visitation, the funeral or memorial service, and the burial.
- Flowers or donations: where people can give in their memory, if the family prefers that to flowers.
- Thanks: optional, to a hospice, the nurses or caregivers.
A template you can fill in
Copy it, replace what is in brackets, and delete what does not fit.
[Full name], [age], of [city], passed away [peacefully / suddenly / after a long illness] on [date], [at home / surrounded by family].
[First name] was born on [date] in [place] to [parents]. [He / She] [studied at / graduated from] [school] and worked as [job] for [number] years. In [year], [he / she] married [spouse], and together they [raised their children in / built a life in] [place].
[First name] loved [people, places, hobbies]. [He / She] will be remembered for [one thing everyone always said about them].
[First name] is survived by [spouse], [children and their spouses], [number] grandchildren and [siblings]. [He / She] was preceded in death by [names].
A visitation will be held on [day, date] from [time] at [place]. The [funeral / memorial service / celebration of life] will be on [day, date] at [time] at [place], followed by burial at [cemetery]. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to [charity].
More examples
For a father
James "Jim" Carter, 81, of Spokane, Washington, passed away on September 30, 2026, after a short illness.
Jim was born on a wheat farm outside Pullman in 1945 and never lost the farmer's habit of being up before the sun. He served in the U.S. Army from 1965 to 1967, then spent 38 years working for the railroad. He could fix anything with baling wire and patience, and usually did.
He married the love of his life, Linda Moore, in 1969. Together they raised three children and more dogs than anyone could count.
Jim is survived by Linda, his children Tom, Amy and Daniel, eight grandchildren, and his brother Ray. A memorial service with military honors will be held Saturday, October 18, at 2 p.m. at Pine Hill Funeral Home. Donations in Jim's memory may be made to the hospice that cared for him.
For a grandmother
Rosa Martinez, 92, our beloved Abuela, died on October 3, 2026, in San Antonio, Texas.
Born in Monterrey, Mexico, in 1934, Rosa came to Texas as a young bride and raised seven children in a house that always smelled of fresh tortillas. She could feed twenty people on a day's notice, and often did. She never missed Sunday Mass, a grandchild's birthday or the evening news.
She is survived by her seven children, 21 grandchildren and 14 great-grandchildren, who will miss her stories, her laugh and her prayers for every one of them. She was preceded in death by her husband, Ernesto, and her son, Luis.
A rosary will be prayed Thursday at 7 p.m., and the funeral Mass will be celebrated Friday at 10 a.m. at Our Lady of Guadalupe Church.
A short notice for the newspaper
Newspapers charge by length, so many families print a short death notice in the paper and put the full obituary online.
WILSON, Margaret Ann "Peggy," 78, of Dayton, died October 12, 2026. Survived by her children Susan and Michael and six grandchildren. Visitation Thursday, 4 to 7 p.m., Riverside Funeral Home. Funeral Friday, 10 a.m. Donations to the public library.
How long should it be
Most obituaries are between 200 and 450 words. A death notice in the newspaper can be 50 words. Online there is no limit, but a long obituary is not read to the end, so keep the stories for the eulogy and the memorial page.
Newspapers charge by the line or by the inch, with an extra fee for a photo. A long obituary in a big city paper can cost several hundred dollars, sometimes more. The funeral home usually posts the obituary on its website at no extra cost, and will send it to the newspaper for you.
Tips for writing it
- Ask the family first. One memory from each person is often enough to find the heart of the obituary.
- Be specific. Instead of "she was kind," write what she did: the casseroles for every new neighbor, the letters to every grandchild.
- The cause of death is optional. "After a long illness" or "suddenly" is enough. Some families name the illness to raise awareness or to suggest a related charity.
- Humor is welcome if it fits the person. Many of the most loved obituaries make people smile.
- Blended families: name stepchildren, partners and former spouses the way the family knows them. When unsure, include rather than leave out.
- Protect the family. Leave out the exact date of birth, the home address and the mother's maiden name, which identity thieves look for. Ask someone to stay at the house during the funeral.
- Check every name twice and ask someone who knew them to read it before it is published.
Where to publish it
- The funeral home website, usually included in the service, often with an online guestbook.
- The local newspaper, paid, and often also on the paper's website. If the person lived in several places, consider the paper of their hometown too.
- Social media, a short post with the service details and a link to the full obituary.
- A memorial page, where the obituary sits next to the service details and a map, and where friends leave messages, share photos and light a candle, from anywhere. It stays after the funeral, for anniversaries and for the grandchildren. Here is an example.
Frequently asked questions
What is the difference between a death notice and an obituary?
A death notice is a short paid announcement with the name, the date of death and the service details. An obituary tells the story of the person's life and is usually longer.
How long should an obituary be?
Most are 200 to 450 words. A newspaper notice is often shorter because papers charge by length, while online there is no limit.
Who writes the obituary?
Usually a close family member, with help from the funeral director, who checks the service details and can send it to the newspaper.
Do you have to say how the person died?
No. Many families write only that the person died peacefully or after an illness. Some name the cause to raise awareness or to ask for donations to a related charity.
How much does an obituary cost?
On the funeral home website it is usually included. Newspapers charge by length and for a photo, from under a hundred dollars for a short notice to several hundred or more for a long obituary in a big city paper.
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